一年的暑假，我躺在草地上呆呆的望着天空，看着云朵得离合聚散仿佛就像人生的悲欢离合。阳光很温和，风很轻，我的心很平静。突然间我自问：最后一次这样看天空是什么时候，不记得了。我想，这就是所谓的都市人生活，忙碌却没有任何意义。一生在外头打拼，为了生活，金钱，地位和物质上的享受。但其实从另一个角度看，这一切都只是虚幻，是一场梦。梦醒了都是空的。与其如此，还不如无声无息，平平静静地过一生。

总觉得自己的步伐和意愿与现实背道而驰， 不论怎么努力就是无法在现实生活中正常的呼吸。物质上的满足，似乎让我倍感空虚。 也许这不是我真正想最求得。也许，一直以来我都在寻找一片属于自己的天地，就是找不到通往那里的道路。

笑看世态炎凉，这就是现在的我吧。。。

刚刚看完电视剧风声鹤唳再去读它的小说，感觉上电视剧比小说多了几分儿女情长，也不似小说如此的扣人心玄。也许这就是文字美妙指出。一个演员不论他的演技再好，永远也没有手笔来得如此入木三分，如此的震撼人心。风声鹤唳，十多么有分量的四个字。但是电视剧却没有因此而让我的心情变得汹涌澎湃。 可惜的是现在的都市生活让许多人都失去了阅读的习关。尽管电视剧与小说有天渊之别，它们不尽让我觉得一部不朽作品多必须经过战火的蹂躏才能够刻骨铭心，才能流芳千古。让我不由自主地想起 ‘不经一番寒彻骨，焉得梅花扑鼻香“这句话。

went for the m]phosis sale that day.... which also marks the start of the great singapore sale... man this year i really feel like sweeping everything off the shelves and bring them home cos at least i have some cash the spare..... lol oh well. i want to watch pirates!!!!!!!!!!! is like how long ever since it opens.

is learn@ today..... woke up damn early to catch the train. still i lost my way in jurong after being there for briefing last week...... west is really not a place that i am familiar with and it is freaking far and crowded... the event was kinda chaotic.... but at least i know my stuff and i still don't understand what's the point of the teachers to yell at us when the internet connection went down....

went for lunch with wei qiang. i am felling damn tired now. struggling real hard to keep awake. someone please perk me up!!!!!!!!!

my boss is kinda sick....suddenly threw me like 30 over thousand photos in a folder.... most of the times i am quite curious where on earth he got so many photos from man.....

well, the uni admission procedure is kinda complicated. and i have to take QET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN IT. someone pls save me!!!!!!! argh......

sick for the whole week...... 扁条腺发炎:( don't know what is it call in english oops. anyway it was quite bad. had fever for the whole week... average 38.8. my throat felt as if it was burning. i feel weak and the whole body was aching from the bones all the way up my muscle.... i am not exaggerating. it is how the way i felt.

anyway, got into nus real estate. i entirely have no idea what it is..... ganna find out about that. hope is not about selling houses:)

4th day at work and i am damn bored now. wil-kie, my boss is out for meeting and i finished the assignments he gave me one hour ago... and i got nth to do now well done!!!! but i can only go home at 6..... there's perpetually nth to play on this com i am using right now... help someone save me. suppose to go for band bbq at gab's house later.... it is damn near my place but i had to go home cos i need to go somewhere else tonight.... darn!!!! it has been ages ever since i see the banders.... haven even congratulate them for getting gold for sfy...... hazel why are you so slow.... oh well i guess my procastination skill has improve.... hope there's no traffic jam later so i can get back early......

3rd day at work.....everything is going well. i guess i am more or less use to the working environment. got my pass yesterday which at least make me feel more professional. god bless as the days go on.

i am quite please with the com i am working on. however, i just can't seem to install msn which kinda pissed me off. and the web messenger keeps disconnecting which makes my job really inconvenient. oh well, nothing is perfect in the world isn't it...

spend my entire time at work looking at photos. frankly speaking i have really no idea why they took these photos but this is none of my concern. my job is just to tag them. some of the places in the photos are really familiar and i know i had been there before. oh well is singapore. singapore is so small that if you just spend a few years here, you would be familiar with most of the places.

seems like photoshop is not that difficult to learn. getting a hang of it. i seriously need to brush up on the excel. should start digging out my guide book to read. god knows where is it. argh... it must be somewhere in my room hidden in a corner...

hazel will certainly grow FAT.... siting down the whole day. unlike sgb where i stand the entire time, this time round i sit till my butt aches and i still have to sit... i have to sit down in front of the com after meals too... bleah... i swear that all the fats will go to my butt.... why is all my jobs all so extremely different?

this is my second day at work and i realise how early i reached my office. the journey back home yesterday was an agony. still can't understand why i actually made up my mind to come here lol... oh well got a taste of office work. sitting in front of the com whole day is not a piece of cake. it gets really tiring after a while. i am still getting use to the working environment here. starting to miss my friends in ntuc.....

went back to cj today to get my sch grad cert issued by moe. afterwhich went to town to meet nick.... man why does guys always have to be late and let the gals wait for them? shouldn't be the other way round? met him at borders and we WALKED to tanglin mall!!!!!!!! yes WALKED!!!!!!!! MY GOODNESS... by the time i reached there i am like exhausted and i even realised that there's buses to tanglin from my sch. lunch was pretty good as i don't have to pay... kimchi soup with rice and brownie with ice cream....... it's heavenly tasty and sinfully fattening. chatted lots of nonsense knowing him. walked back with him all the way to taka just to look for a dry-fit shirt... can't belief that i actually had to go into the same two shops three times and ended up with him not getting any..... walked back to wheelock and he finally got the shirt from adidas there. afterwhich walked all the way up the hill to the private estates just to collect his car..... the distance i walked today is really unimaginable.....

yesterday was my last day at work..... at least i had the chance to bid my dearest pei shan and hwee fang good bye...... hang on guys!!!!!!! we will meet again!!!!!!!!!!!!

okay... finally i get down to some updating of my blog as i realised how lazy i had been.

firstly, went out with xin last fri. at the end of the day we went for kbox instead of 200 pounds beauty. kboxing with xin was quite fun. sang like 20 over songs.... ate nuts and crackers like mad that i was so full for dinner:) however, got a call from karen which freaked me out. i thought i forgot to go for work again. man... she asked me to go back and sign some documents which i coulld have sign it the next day bleahs. so i didn't manage to go for dinner with xin and angel. i left in such a rush that i even forgottened to get my little present from xin who kindly bought me from china!!!!!!!!!!!!

secondly, i am gladly counting down on the days i left for sgb and i am relief to take a break from there. can't stand the people there anymore. they are really ridiculously unreasonable...... hang on there my dear sgb folks.... i am going to miss all of you!!!!!!!!!!

thirdly, i was having fever, flu and gastric pain for the past one week and i am still having them.... damn it. it was so bad that i had to take mc on thur...... thankfully han came to my house and hence i was not so bored being bedridden. she came to teach me a bit of photoshop which i hope i will put into good use at MOE. sadly i still know nuts about excel. hopefully i don't need it there....

went for smu interview today. god almost fell asleep in the conference hall. probably cos of the medicine i took which makes my drowsy. struggled so hard to keep myself awake. afterwhich i went to han's grandma's wake. it's barely one year after my grandpa passed away. since is also at singapore casket and i still see the same old faces i saw at my grandpa's wake, it brought back all the memories i had about my grandpa's wake.... suddenly it makes me feel that everything around me are fake and life is just like a dream!!!!!!!!! man hazel is being emo again lol.

oh wells.... that's about all i guess:)

just submitted the resignation letter. going over to MOE on the 14 may. oh well a change of woking environment and experience.... the thought of dragging myself all the way from my house to MOE makes me sick. just receieved a letter from nus to go for interview. as usual i know nuts about the course and what's it about